For an isiXhosa man fatherhood isn't just about biology. It's a journey marked by a
traditional custom called intlawulo. Intlawulo translates to damages and involves the father
and his family acknowledging responsibility for a child born out of wedlock. It's more than a
financial transaction it's a formal process of seeking acceptance and building a relationship
with the mother's family.Negotiations between families establish respect and pave the way for
the father's involvement. Intlawulo signifies his commitment to the child's well-being and
future. Fulfilling this obligation isn't just about financial support but about taking his
rightful place in the child's life.While some view intlawulo as outdated its significance
remains. It fosters a sense of accountability in fathers and strengthens the village it takes
to raise a child. For the father intlawulo becomes the bridge to becoming a true isiXhosa
father - one who is present respected and an integral part of his child's upbringing.
